Sunday, January 18, 2015

Rant for today.

Can you still be friends with someone you like after they've turned you down? I hope so, I will give it a try.

I seem to have lost my hope for any romantic relationships. People have said things like "don't settle," "my last relationship happened when I wasn't looking, maybe that will help" "maybe the timing isn't right" and "there is someone for everyone"
Stop right there.

When I'm finally brave enough to be the one to make moves, I get rejected. (Although most recent case has a valid reason, that doesn't help for any other times...)
When I resort to internet dating, the one person I'm interested in talks for a while, then drops off the face of communication. (Like months we talked and attempted to meet.)
Even when I stop looking and just focus on me I have no results.
I have no idea what needs to be done in order for anything to be accomplished in any aspect of this now.

So I quit. I'm not going to try. Not going to "not look" I am done. This shit is getting old and I'm tired of putting myself out there only to be passed over. Being passed over sucks and I have had this happen for pretty much my whole life.
I want to say it gets easier to accept over the, bit the truth is it doesn't. It still sucks. It sucks being lonely, it sucks feeling like you need someone to make you not feel lonely.

So I'm going to take the lonely and shove it in a closet. Shouldn't bottle up feelings, but in this case it isn't a feeling I want and of the only way to be rid of it is to ignore it, then I will.

Thursday, January 15, 2015

Tonight.

Recently I've basically given out all my social media to people I know. This and twitter are really the only options I have to vent, and who can do that in 140 characters?
I've been trying to get the attention of a person I like, by which I mean to get him to see me as more then just a helpful person.
Unfortunately for me he just got out of a relationship so he doesn't want one right now, completely understand. What makes me sad is that there really isn't anything I can do other than let him know I'm here to listen.
I've already basically told him I like him, so there's nothing left to say for now.

I also think somehow I may have screwed things up, or he actually just is busy because he isn't responding to any forms of communication.

Nobody else is responding to me tonight either, which leads me to the title. Tonight. Tonight is just not my night for people talking to me.

Sooooo I sigh and anxiously await a response from people.